TRUE VERSUS TOXIC MASCULINITY

 In the 11th century, killing someone in war

was a sin requiring a 40 day fast

whether you killed in offence or defence.

 

In the 21st century we have become mass killers

with no remorse. We are now going to kill

the planet we live on: sawing off the branch

we perch on. So much for “progress.”

 

The key issues for men today are shame and aggression

which relate to the key issue of our time:

human survival. The True Masculine integrates

heart and mind/word and deed/self and other

whereas competitive society operates mainly

out of the male ego-level. True men go beyond “me-first”

to the well-being of others.

 

Thomas Merton: “The truthful person

cannot long remain violent. And the violent person

cannot see the Truth: Violence comes from believing the Big Lie

that your enemy is violent and evil

whereas you are good and peace-loving.

This ironically justifies your violence against your enemy.

Far easier to find and destroy a scapegoat

than to look inside at your own violence and evil.”

Whatever is not accepted is projected onto others.

 

Mothers at their best can give boys

a primordial experience of oneness

so they know in their hearts they are the Beloved.

But this is unconscious union.

When we grow and start to compete/compare/judge things

divisions start as well.

What we need is authentic spirituality

that leads to conscious oneness with God and all things.

 

Yet we want to avoid discomfort/be safe/be healed

all at the same time. But we can never completely avoid uncertainty

which makes us afraid. True spiritual warriors accept that

we never know what will happen next.

Anchored in God they remain at peace –

one with God in the midst of external chaos/war.

 

 

Published by

Bruce Tallman

Since 2002 I have been a full-time spiritual director in private practice in London Ontario. I have published two books on spiritual direction for spiritual directors. One of them, "Finding Seekers," is a best seller in the field. I have also published two books on spirituality for the general public. The latest one is called "God's Ecstatic Love: Transform Your Life with a Spiritual Masterpiece." It is a 21st century update of Francis de Sales' classic "Treatise on the Love of God." See Amazon.com The London Free Press has published hundreds of my articles on spirituality, theology and ethics and I have facilitated marriage preparation with over 3500 couples since 1988. For more information see www.brucetallman.com

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